BONUS SERIES: Dwell on These Things, Ep. 1 // Melissa Kruger - Experience Real Joy | Word First

guys Welcome to our special six episode series called dwell on these things I'm ver Schmidt and I'm her sister Natalie Abbot and guys we are talking about the six verses in our new scripture Memory Bible study with some of our friends some really fun amazing guests and we are talking about our highest highs like joy and peace and having a firm mind and The Nearness of God himself but Natalie we aren't just talking about the high highs we are getting vulnerable and we have a lot of compassion about are lowest lows like things that plague our hearts things that keep us up at night um the things that give us anxiety these are really practical good honest real conversations with real friends and experts in these matters I'm so excited yeah and we are so glad that you're here with us you don't have to do our dwelling these things Bible study to listen in but I guarantee if you are listening to this you're going to want to grab that Bible study at some point and do it with some friends it is such a great thing to have these verses memorized for yourself and we're so excited to have you here with us thanks for joining us hey I'm Natalie Abbott and I'm ver schmidtz we are sisters who host the dwell differently podcast we help you memorize and meditate on one Bible verse every month and all month long on our podcast we talk about what that verse means why it matters and how we can apply that verse to our daily lives hey welcome to well on these things I'm Natalie Abbott and I'm our sister ver schmidtz and today we are going to be talking about Joy we're going to be talking about Philippians 4:4 that says rejoice in the lord always I will say it again rejoice and we have an awesome guest here with us Melissa Krueger she is thebomb.com and we cannot wait to just dive into joy and all that God has for us in this text and what it means when we talk about living out our lives with joy yeah and Melissa you can put that on your resume now bomb.com like I know people probably call you that all the time but I just I didn't see it on your on your bio so we probably should we should put that my kids will be the most impressed they'll be like wow Mom that's great that's fine any jy's ears listening is like that Millennial just said the bomb.com so you know we're just trying to bridge the gap and embarrass everyone and I feel good about it though uh yeah you just type that in www bomb.com and there's my picture will come up yeah that's great awesome all right well so we're talking about Joy today guys um we did this bible study on Philippians 4 4-9 and our verse that we are talking about today it's the first verse Philippians 4:4 rejoice in the lord always I will say it again rejoice and uh Melissa actually is sort of like an expert on the book of Philippians she wrote a study on the book of Philippians and and specifically on Joy so like I'm just so glad to have you here with us I I feel a lot of Joy um having a joy expert here I don't know if I'm a joy expert that's that's it I I'm a I'm a joy fighter I'm a fighter for Joy let me put it that way you know I love it yeah I love it well if you if you guys finish the study um on Philippians and you want to know more about specifically joy in Philippians you're like just looking for um a focus on that like that I would just encourage you we'll have a link in our notes for you guys to check that out but before before we talk about joy and Philippians like what what do we mean by the word Joy what's the difference between happiness and joy yeah that's a great question right because I mean those two concepts get so interwoven in our modernday world and I think think I I think the way and and here's the thing about language you know it's always changing so some of it is how a person is using it because yeah if you look at the Beatitudes they can be translated happy is he who does you know rather than blessed is you know what po blessed are the poor in spirit or whatever it can be happy is the poor in spirit so some of this is how language changes and and evolves and all of those things but what I think in our modern day culture happiness is used to Des describe something that is normally rooted in a temporal situation and it's circumstantial so we're happy that we got an ice cream cone we're happy that we got a new job we're happy that that guy asked us out we're H you we're happy based in something that is circumstantial um I think Joy speaks to something that is rooted in an unchanging reality so it's it's really the object of the happiness or the joy that that I think makes the difference between the two so happiness tends to be in the physical world rooted in those things that are ever changing so therefore it can be lost um it you know whereas Joy if we're talking about spiritual Joy that's going to be rooted and the fruit of the spirit being Joy that's rooted in something the spirit is doing in our lives and it's rooted in an eternal reality which hopefully is God himself and that's that's the source of our joy and then even how he's working so it's not that Joy is independent of circumstances you know we're not just saying oh only be joyful in the Lord we can be joyful in what the Lord's doing in the world but it's still related to spiritual realities not just temporal ones would you uh explain a little further about the fruits of the spirit and you you kind of alluded to that like when when when you're thinking about Joy Joy like what does it mean that that that Joy is a fruit of the spirit and for anybody who's unfamiliar with that idea like can you help us understand what that would mean yeah I think um this is such a helpful thing too because you think about these things um Galatians tells us the fruit of the spirit is love joy peace patience kindness you know and it has this list of these attributes that are often things we try to externally put on like I'm going to work really hard at being kind today or self-controlled or patient and we go and look and we say okay I'm going to put these on well the Bible talks about those things as actually being as we abide in Jesus as we root ourselves in him the fruit that is born is these things so it's not that they're put on but they're produced and so that's a totally different thing so this is the difference between going to I have a plum tree out in my backyard well what if I just went and tied plum on it okay then then it would look like well there are plums there it's a plum tree but I could do that on any Tree in my backyard but the the what really makes the plum tree a plum tree is that it's producing the fruit but the plum tree isn't trying it's Abiding and therefore as it abides in the soil it Bears these fruit so the the thing about Joy is it comes from our abiding in Jesus and it's borne by the spirit's power in us so an analogy I always like to say is you know like we have these wonderful little devices cell phones but they have to have a power they're Mighty right they seem to do so much they can tell us world news from around the world yeah they can do all this stuff but if it's not plugged in it doesn't work and thus is our souls you know if the the Lord has appointed means by which we bear fruit and it's not my hard work it's not my efforts it's not me getting my life sorted so that there's nothing hard in it and I can always be joyful that's not where Joy comes from Joy comes from being abide abiding in Jesus and he Bears the fruit in our lives I I get a little sermon Cy we'll just end the call here the the interview here now y'all go think about that for a while so good Ian it ties right into that next question of like what does it mean to rejoice in the lord it's like this verse does not say rejoice in your wallet I will say it again Rejoice it's like you could like rejoice in your family that family is a great thing your children are great they're wonderful they bring so much joy but they are not the source of our joy and I think just that that image of um you know when you read this verse it it kind of hits you in the face a little bit you're like rejoice in the lord always I was saying again Rejoice you're like okay um Joy I can try to do that but like to your point you're we're not putting that on it is coming from in the Lord like rejoice in the Lord he is the source we must abide in him it's just so good yeah yeah and everything else is gonna ultimately fail right cuz we love our families but goodness some days they're going to be hard to rejoice in yeah but we can always rejoice in the Lord who gave us our family and I I mean yeah it's just the only anchor that holds everything else will fail and it will put too much pressure on any other object to put our joy in them I mean have you seen kids whose mother their Joy is in their child it's not good for the kid have you seen a husband whose wife puts her joy in her husband it's not good for him if we put our joy in something other than the Lord they simply can't bear the weight of it and it will always make them miserable and US miserable I mean because they can't satisfy and they will either I mean they will crumble under the weight of trying to be the source of our joy it's funny because just this morning I've been praying um as you know school starts P up and praying about my kids and and the things that they go through I've kind of Taken to like praying for one kid each day and I was praying for one of my kids this morning and I've noticed this tendency in this particular kid to really um have these expectations that are really high that this thing is going to be the thing and I I found myself just praying that that they would they would realize how those things don't fill them up like I see that in them I see them you know having these huge expectations and then being crushed and then having them again for some other thing and then being crushed and I was just praying I'm like Lord help them see that those are not g to ultimately give them joy and so I just think it's that's a that's such a great way to think about joy in our own lives or in the lives of other people it's like I I pray that for myself like would I be a person who isn't going in for these counterfeit Joys you know allowing those things that are that are just ultimately not created to to fill me up to try to somehow you know squeeze out of the dry sponge some a little a little bit of Joy like that's not what they were intended to do um and so I just think that that's such a such a problem I think we have um but like Melissa would you talk a little bit more about those tendencies that we have when you know when we're looking for Joy where where do we typically go as humans and where where would where do you go because I think it's I think that's just natural for us as as humans to to have those like exciting things that are coming up and to misplace our joy or to have things that are going on in our life or hopes that we have that we we put our joy in that space and like you said it's not safe um can you talk a little more about that yeah I mean I think this is a huge thing it's and and everyone is different in how we do this right we're all kind of attracted to different things but sometimes I like to think of the world as this like huge candy store right and it is actually full of good things um I think the the problem is we often think we're going to know the bad things cuz they look dark and ominous and all of this or the things that are really going to take our hearts and you know take them a astray we think we're going to recognize it like look I look at a spider and I'm like that spider looks bad you I want to crush it you know whatever it's a lot it's a lot harder to look at something that looks good and it is good because the Lord created it and so so the thing is it's like we always just have to put things in their right place um the example I like to use is if a woman is desperately thirsty and she's standing before the ocean and she has a cup in her hand and she is so desperately thirsty and the reality is we're all desperately thirsty because this world isn't isn't what it should be so the fact that we have longings the fact that we have desires for Joy that's a good longing because we were created for something better but she's searing at this water and it looks like it will quench her thirst and if she if she takes that cup and she thinks I'm going to just have a drink and that's going to satisfy me we all know we all would want to shout at her don't drink because if she drinks the salt water um it's not going to quench her thirst and if she keeps drinking it she's going to actually die it will actually kill her what looks like it might provide relief is actually going to kill her and here's the thing about the ocean it's not bad the ocean's very good it's beautiful it's fun to swim in it's right in its place but it was never intended to satisfy us and so here's the thing we all go to things that are right in their place but we're never intended to satisfy us so I mean you know John Calvin basically says the heart is a human Idol Factory whatever there is in this world could be made into an idol and that that's essentially what we're talking about the source a misplace source of joy is essentially an idol and what we don't mean by that is it's not a statue that you bow down to it's not it's not you know what we might think of as an idol it's basically what what becomes the center of our heart and we say that is what will give me life that is what will satisfy me and so I mean that can be anything goodness it can be our dress size it can be our children's performance it can be the our spouse taking us on nice dates it whatever we look to other than the Lord for satisfaction is can become a false place to find Joy however when right things are writed when the Lord is the source of Joy I want to say we can enjoy all those things we should enjoy marriage it's a good thing we should enjoy children they're a blessing from the Lord we should enjoy a body that works healthy and you know and that's a good gift to have days of Health where we can serve others those are all good things in their place just like the ocean is a good thing in its place it just isn't meant to be ingested as our main meal that is so good so when you like if you find yourself in that place I think we all do sometimes where it's like you get I almost it's almost like a like a pattern sometimes I think where we get we kind of get stuck in a in a loop of like a pattern of well I'm just going to do this thing because I'm exhausted and this is going to give me a the a little hit of Joy or whatever it is I might scroll my phone or whatever that thing is when you find yourself in that place how do you get back on track well honestly all of this is actually a belief issue and so what I the fight for me is all it's a daily fight and it takes place every morning when I set myself before my Bible and say this is the most important choice I make today this will keep my soul wred just um you know I always say if you want to have a healthy body it's not a hard thing to know that you need to eat right in exercise like that's not hard simple to understand extremely hard to live some days the same as is true for our souls to prosper Psalm 1 is this pathway it says blessed is the man whose Delight is in the law of the Lord and on it he meditates day and night he's like a tree that's planted by a stream of water whatever he does prospers whatever and you know to be that tree that's planted by a stream of water that's where we begin so so the best battle are the daily habits of getting God's words in our soul which is what I love about what dwell does because it's the more it's implanted and memorized wow the more we're going to be recalling it and the spirit will do it his work by Rec you know I mean I love it in John where it says the spirit will remind you of the things I have said to you and so when that word is implanted in our soul the spirit reminds us of what Jesus has said to us and that is going to give us lasting joy and that's going to just even show our heart hey are you expecting are you trying to squeeze out of that person or thing what it was never intended to give you the spirit will do that work we don't even have I mean the spirit as we meet before him and we pray and we spend time in the word I always say the word does the work um we just have to be in the word that sometimes can be hard to do hey guys I hope that you are loving this this conversation just as much as we loved having it these guests are amazing their words are powerful but the most powerful part about this conversation is God's word amen ver yeah if you are looking to get those words in your heart and mind gosh we would love to encourage you to go ahead and get that Bible study grab some friends do it with friends and have these conversations yourself um get those words in your heart and mind we give you all the tools to do it in the Bible study if you're interested you can check out our links and our show notes that'll be in there for you and then also you can just go to dwell.com you'll find it on our website we're so glad you're here with [Music] us that's so good it's so true just um yesterday I was having this moment where sometimes one thing that will steal my joy is thinking like reflecting on great memories and it like makes my heart sad like remember when my 7-year-old was 1 and a half and I I had this like grief of like he's not one and a half anymore and like it will steal away my joy and just yesterday this it was in the morning and a new practice that I have is writing out my prayers in this beautiful hosana Revival fiveyear Journal that I bought for myself at uh the Gospel Coalition event and I was writing and it just like thinking about that moment it's like that is actually an okay thing to feel I should that is there is sadness in that but then like putting myself back in this moment and thanking God that like I have these memories thanking God that I'm making memories right now with my seven-year-old that I will look at seven years from now and be like remember when he was seven and just like putting my feet back on the rock that my children do not fulfill me my littlest best memories do not fulfill me they're all just a a gift from The Giver you know and and reminding myself that ultimately like like you said like when I abide in the Lord when I am in the word it just roots and establishes me back on the only foundation that is sure you know yeah and I love what you just said because there is a place in scripture too for lament like when we talk about rejoicing the joy in the lord always isn't it this you know you see in the Psalms right the psalmist Bears his soul to the Lord we you all this stuff and then says and yet this I will recall that there's this constant Soul Battle For Joy and I I I don't want anyone to be ever discouraged by that like none of us wake up every morning just it's it this is a fallen world like there is real hardship and there is real sadness and there are heavy things that people are called to Bear every single day um that feels overwhelming to me like to me I'm sure in your lives and so the fight for Joy is actually an acknowledgement we have to acknowledge it's not all okay here there are real losses there are real hardships but it's a looking forward and saying I know a better world's coming um so we're Heavenly minded in as we're as we're living through this and I think that's really helpful because if our expectation is that all should be right here we will never have joy it's actually the expectation that yeah this is not my home and so you know and think about it like when you're on the road or you're in the airport you don't think hm I should be super comfortable today and you know everything should go my way you're kind of prepped right you're in the airport you're like it's going to be bad it's going to be crowded people are going to be in my space I I'm going to be sweating cuz I'm running to you know whatever you're just prepared that things won't go well and so your mental shifts and so I think we part of yeah let's talk about Instagram and what we'll rob you of your joy we we we're looking at other people too often and thinking they've somehow found the secret sauce in life and they've found this place where they got all their circumstances they got balance they got work life B you know whatever I'm like they don't it's just look at scripture scripture tells you we're all facing hard things this world is not as it should be so that's our expectation and then in the midst of a world that's not right we drink from the well which is Christ and we have refreshment in a dry and weary land that's that's it you know it's it's an acknowledgement it's a dry and weary land and there's a source of refreshment anyway sorry I will stop just going all the different ways it's so it's identifying I think what we all feel like yeah whether it's like a true crisis and there seems to be no good that could come of this thing or it's that deep ache I feel when I my I realize my kids are getting older all of that is pointing to like exactly what you're explaining like this is not right this is awful sometimes you know and so I think you're exactly right it's a stream in the Wasteland like we have to go to the stream because really we're we're not this is not our home yeah this is not where we will end you know yeah I think um um I appreciate that holding those that tension in tandem um and I think there's something about doing that in honesty especially in hard Seasons that is so attractive and it's so like it's a it's a it's a weird thing for somebody who has a lot of hardship to have joy like there is just a a brightness and a light there that it like calls people and it's like what is like what's the matter with you you know like in a good way what is going on in you that would create that and Melissa would you talk to that because I think sometimes um you know we forget that everybody's watching like the the verse following this in Philippians 4:5 says let your gentleness be evident to all the Lord is near and just this idea that that all people are are watching and for us to have this joy for us to have this this gentle you know otherworldly kind of way of living it doesn't just impact our own Souls but it is it is the Light of Christ in us that is that is beautiful and that calls people in so like how like speak to speak to how Joy is not just for us but it is it is part of our evangelism our call of other people like this is the life you want absolutely I think it's one of the most missed things I think first Peter when it says always be prepared yeah we we think of these oh I've got to take an apologetics course you know I've got to always be prepared but if you keep reading the verse it says always be prepared to give a defense and now we're like oh defense for the hope that is it with within you oh hold on I thought you were going to I'm I'm supposed to be prepared to defend why Jesus died and you the resurrection I'm supposed to be prepared to give a hope for yeah I mean I'm supposed to be prepared to give a defense of why the word is true all these things that are good to know apologetically why we can defend our faith but it starts with them coming up to you always be prepared to give an answer for the reason of of the hope that is within you that means they're looking at your life and they're like your hope does not make sense to me like they're that bothered kind of by your hope because it later talks about you're going to be persecuted for doing good you know for doing good and it's all of those things but it's like basically like your hope is just not making sense to them Johnny eronata I heard on a podcast one time and she described people who suffer with hope as spectacles of glory and she said it's like Moses when he saw the burning bush it didn't make sense to him it was totally engulfed in flames but it wasn't being consumed and she said it was a spectacle of glory and it made you stop and look and and so you know in in times of true suffering you you see these people right they're spectacles of Glory in fact the Philippian study um that I wrote I I taught it to a Bible study I was in it was an Outreach Bible study we invited everybody from our preschool and a friend of mine debie who started coming um the very first time she C came she had a big cotton ball like tape to her arm you know like when you've had blood work and I was asking her what she' just been diagnosed with breast cancer um and that was the start of a journey that would be about four years and ultimately she would die but here's what I can say during that time her faith came alive in such a way that she glowed I mean you her everything about cancer is awful everything about it you know CH the treatments every you everything that's happening her physical shell is in Decay but her life Her Shine the glow is radiating off of her and it was this picture of that's Joy because it doesn't come it's not coming from the outward it's Inward and it must shine outwardly and I think um I think that's that's the thing our joy as you said it's not just about us it's a witness to the watching world that something that he who is in US is greater than he who is in the world and that Satan May ass assail us the world may crush us with its circumstances but he is enough to be the source of our joy I andan it speaks it more loudly maybe than any other thing oh so good and so true and and if you've ever suffered even in the slightest I had a really hard year of anxiety and you never want to wish suffering upon anyone or yourself but there is a lot of Truth to the fact that when you are in it The Nearness of Christ and the way that he be he really becomes your everything he really like you really get this he he was my everything nothing nothing else could do anything for me even my helpful and kind husband who was walking with me could not fill me but Christ could in those really hard moments and the joy after that season of like I have to tell everybody I have to tell everybody like if you're here like go to the word it will it will fill you and it will feed you and it will be everything you need you know and you know there are other great things like community and all these other things that you also want but Christ at the at the Bare Bones of it he will be your source of life and of joy and when you're in it be encouraged like there is no greater thing that you could have than Jesus himself and he is there waiting amen amen it's so good okay guys we are getting close here to the end and I have so many other questions um I guess maybe I would love to hear Melissa I would love to hear you speak to the person who's listening to this who is feeling really joyless and um what would you say to somebody who's like man I just I hear you I do read my Bible but I'm still like in this place where I like my circumstances are so hard or my anxiety is so high or um whatever it is like what would you say to somebody in that space just to encourage enourage them that that there is Joy still for them yeah I think um sometimes we can hear things like this and put the pressure on ourselves to tie the joy onto our tree in in some sense like um we desperately it could be a work just like anything else like I mean it can become something that I think we feel like we have to prove to the world and you can see the difference between spirit andus joy and joy that's put on because Joy that's Put on Will judge everyone else um and it will be kind of a sour joy in the end um versus Spirit infused Joy which is actually making us softer and we understand that it comes at a battle and it's not easy and it's only in the Lord and so what I would say is don't feel like you have to fake it read the Psalms I would actually always Point people to the Psalms cuz you're you're going to see the most honest cries of incredibly imperfect people who are fighting to believe fighting to put on faith um and so I would say be be in the Psalms see what it looks like to actually Express real emotion um and and and and the practice of putting our joy in the Lord is remembering who he is so the other thing I would say is I think it's a good season to write out um what you are thankful for about the Lord what is true about your day you know and sometimes for me it's oh everyone else may leave me but you will never leave me like just writing some of those promises that we know about the truth truths that the Lord has said he will never leave us he will never forsake us um he is good he will be with me whatever the trial may come the the waves they will not overflow like all of that scripture that we have hidden in our heart can come back in these moments um and really encourage us if you don't have that scripture hidden in your heart I encourage you to say go to that friend who you know does and say will you send me a reminder of a verse each day about who God is um someone that you spiritually can trust will you will you do that for me just so I will meditate on it each day because I don't even know where to find it so some of us you know don't know where to go but you might have a friend who who can do that for you there are tons of apps now that can even throw them up on your phone yeah little things like that maybe y'all I I don't know what those are because I'm not that techsavvy but I see them on people's phones I'm like that'd be really good to have um there there are great places we can get you know God's word into our hearts and and what I would say is it's okay that it's slow um you know all of our Lives go in Seasons I think we're really uncomfortable with that we want the fruit all the time every day and and the Lord is going to be working and I think the longer we walk with him the more we see those Harvest but I do a lot of gardening in in in my backyard and what I noticed is it comes in seasons and you can't hurry the fruit that the tree has to abide it has to drink in the sun and the soil so it's not manufactured by the tree it's produced as you know the sun and the rain work on it and we're told in Isaiah 55 the word will accomplish its purpose as It Goes Forth like rain it's going to accomplish a purpose and eventually we will get there um but sometimes I think we want results like I read a verse today and I'm not joyful right like it's like I ate a carrot and now my my blood pressure hasn't gone down or whatever you know we we these things I I do think they take a lot of time and a lot of study I think we think contentment and joy descend um Paul said said in Philippians I've learned the secret of being content in all things that means it was not something that descended upon him but something he learned as he walked through hard things and he walked through good things and and I think there's a lot of Hope in that because learning anything new takes time and takes effort and is not easy um but it does it does mean it's learnable so whatever circumstance we're in it is learnable that's hopeful but it does mean that it's going to take you know it's it's going to take time that's a great word Melissa I wish we could talk longer you guys but I think we've got to wrap this up um ver any last thoughts from you over there I'm just grateful that um that Melissa that you came on and just the wisdom and the encouragement and the how practical this can be and and anybody can do it reading the Psalms inviting a friend to speak God's word when you are exhausted and you don't know where to go like these are these are practic IC things that we all can do and even for a seasoned believer sometimes you go through those Seasons where you need the help you need to go back to the psalm so I just want to thank you for your wisdom and I just um can I pray us out is that cool do it that's that's very cool it's a new hip thing everybody's doing oh Lord we just thank you for this time and we thank you for your word and the truth that it does not return void and we just pray God that you would lead us us back to yourself that we would choose daily to abide in you and that you would produce good fruit like you say that you will um we love you and God would you just encourage us and would the spirit lead us to continue on a path um that you've laid out for us and we ask this in Jesus name amen amen amen thanks for listening to Today's show but before you go I just want to give you a great tip I have started getting my news through a Christian news source called the pourover you can either listen to their short daily podcast or you can get their news sent to your inbox I get both and depending on the day I either listen or I read the news but here's the really great thing it helps keep me up to date on current events but it does so in a way that isn't shock news or biased it's just the facts interspersed with relevant biblical truth to help keep things in the right perspective which is really important uh it's really great it's free and if you're interested in giving it a try there's a link in the show notes [Music]